11th
Ham and Cheese
The Question: Can you classify people into sandwich types?
The Answer: Yes.
One of my professors at school is pure ham and cheese. No mustard, no mayo, not even a few slices of onion or lettuce. Just the straight h and c, and definitely on white bread. He could probably be the type that you buy at the airport where the cheese gets a little smushed on the sides and melds together with the meat. Now, I’m not calling him cheap. I’m just trying to extract his personality and channel it through sandwich phenomena.
The man is slightly post-middle aged crisis. He’s balding, has a high-pitched german accent, and is inadvertently funny. Divorced, bitter, and cynical, he surely gets lost at times. He often imparts false information during lecture simply because he doesn’t care. Yet he’s buoyant and will surprise you. He sometimes shows you his depth, and other times, well, not so much. But he never lets you down. You know what you’re getting when the man walks through the door- just like you knew what you were getting when you unwrapped the tin foil from your sandwich in 3rd grade- the ham and cheese.
